Regulars

Don is a regular customer. He's a pretty cool guy. He came in with his twin brother from Oakland the other day. I saw it as a great photo opportunity:

(LC)

3 -Swann Street

I first heard this song on a compilation tape that a friend from Ohio made me way back in 1992ish. Wendy, who I met through the classified ads in Maximum Rock N Roll, made me the tape. Back then MRR had tons of classifieds with people writing and sharing via the mail. Wendy and I wrote back and forth for a few years and I ended up riding the Greyhound out to visit her in 1994. I stayed in Kent, OH for 4 months. Ohio was a great place to be in 1994. It was a great jumping point to visit all the eastern cities and it was rad to immerse myself amongst a slew of people I didnt know. This song will probably stick with me forever due to the time and place and frame of mind I was in when I fell in love with it. The band that does it is called 3, and they were from DC and on Dischord records. Their drummer was also the drummer of the hardcore band Minor Threat, most of the members went on to play in a band called Grey Matter also on Dischord. (Bug)

My top 10 albums of 2012

People may be a little relieved that my top 10 this year isn't as bleak as last year's. That said, this year's list is almost a cliche by now for me. A lot of my favorite bands put out albums and even though these new albums may not be these bands' best albums, they will most likely always end up on any year-end top 10 list of mine if they've put out a new album: My Top albums of 2012 1. Neurosis-Honor Found In Decay 2. Pig Destroyer-Book Burner 3. Napalm Death-Utilitarian 4. Converge-All We Love We Leave Behind 5. King Tuff-King Tuff 6. The Pyramids-Otherworldly 7. Nachtmystium-Silencing Machine 8. Evoken-Atra Mors 9. Unsane-Wreck 10. Weapon-Embers And Revelations Other bands that put out albums in 2012 that I really appreciated: Swans Godspeed You Black Emperor Pallbearer Ash Borer Deathspell Omega Xibalba Witchcraft Laengthengurth/Pile Of Maggot Infested Viscera split Tragedy 16 Old Man Gloom Off! Liberteer Fontanelle The Ravonettes The Deftones (I'm sure I'm forgetting a bunch more) Track of the year: (LC)

public restrooms

We had a major blow-out with our plumbing and we had to go easy on the water the last 2 weeks. It's all fixed now, but there were a couple of days with no water at all. I took a big dump at Safeway. This particular Safeway had a very nice and clean Men's Room. I was impressed, so I took my time and was not disturbed by anyone. I'm over the whole "not pooping in public" thing. When you know you gotta go, you just feel better once you got it out. (LC)

Used books

I ordered a used book from Amazon. It said the condition was "acceptable" and the price was low. It has sticky stuff on it! I'm pretty sure it's just glue...I guess that's what I get for being cheap...(LC)

Biker movie marathon update

I watched 5 or 6 more biker movies but lost interest as they began to seem less and less legit. Hell's Angels '69 had real Hell's Angels in it. How can you go from those gnarly dudes like that to phoneys in striped shirts and leather caps? They just weren't believable bikers and they didn't seem very tough at all. Stone was pretty good, though. The last biker movie I watched last month was Grease 2, but I had already seen it, so I don't think it counts. (LC)

My favorite songs of 2012

Steve Adamyk Band "Landslide"

Neon Piss"Look Homeward Angel"

Hospital Job "Search Party"

http://hospitaljob.bandcamp.com/track/search-party

 

Be My Doppelganger "It Aint Love"

http://bemydoppelganger1.bandcamp.com/track/it-aint-love

 

Hickey "El Farolito" (reissue)

 

 

King Tuff  "Hit And Run"

Neurosis "We All Rage In Gold"

 

 

Torche "Kicking"

Cloud Nothings "Wasted Days"

 

 

 

 

 

Zack Galfa-Whatever his name is.

I'm gonna watch his dvd Live At The Purple Onion right now. Is this guy funny? I thought the movie The Hangover was kinda dumb. He seems like a guy I would never associate with. Kinda jocky. I'm not so into that style. I'll watch this now and see if my opinion changes.

Generosity

Apparently, some dude last came in to the store last night and gave the guys a free XBox...probably stolen.

(credit to JayDray for the photos). (LC)

Band names for sale

Bug and I had a little brainstorm sesh to try and come up with ways to fund this resource. 'Tis true we don't get paid for providing this valuable information, but we NEVER said we were non-profit. We will take any money given to us for this cause. We understand that as a consumer, you probably want something a little more tangible than our insights. We decided to sell band names that we come up with. These are uniquely hand-crafted, but we understand. We tried to make the prices reasonable. Here they are with their prices next to them. You could name your band: Michael Jackson - $20.00, The Broncos - $18.99, Rudimentary Penis - 8 bones, Borah Lions - $8, The Strip-Searchers - 1 dollar bill, Airport Security - (name your price), The Chicken Strippers - 5 bucks, The Slim-Jims - $8, Hot Tamales - $9.99, Hershey & The Squirts - $49.99, Bad Tatt - (whatever you paid for yours), Baseball-Football - $5 or $6. Take your pick, Ted & The Hard Rock Cochells - $14.99, Violent Hump - 20 bucks, Scott Tonder & The Tater Tots - $50.00, Worn Out - $89.99, Worm Out - $20.55, The Wide Stance - (name your price), The Hairy Houdinis - $77.77, Slipped Jav - $6.66, Pythons In Nylons - 12 bucks, Bulk Hogan - $12, Hairy Belafonte - $19.99, Banana Nicole Smith - $45.99, Tricky Drip - $3, Kurt Bile - $12.99, World Chump - $1, Rocky I'VE - a buck, Chimp Pansy - 15 bucks, Phony Accent - 33 dollars, The Pop-Tarts - 15 bucks, Fake Dick - $18.99, MF Fotoshop - $8, The Fridge Perry - $72, Hot Ice, Dude - $300.00, Jus Lik Dat - $5, Da Bears - (buy me a polish sausage and you can have it), The Pay Pals - 50 bucks, MacDons - $6.99, The Butt-Plugs - (make us an offer), Crack Sniffers - (we're open to suggestions), We're Bros - $5, Dorito Breath - about 4 dollars, Pass The Piss Test - $29.95 (I think that's what Tommy Chong is asking), Pass The Tits - $5, Pissed Test - $20, THA DINGLEBERRIES - $4, Secret Santa - $15.99, Santa Claws - $30, The Secret Admirerees - $7.99, Motorbread - $4, The Low Blows - $2.99, Metallicrud - $.99, Tight Baunch - $20, Full House - $20, The Wymen - $100, Pillage People - $20, Fartridge Family - $3.99, Sticks - $2, Big Dump - (make us an offer), Supreme Pizzaz - $4, Ham - $39.99, The Rug Dealers -$5, The diKinks - $3, Blackened Crusties - $12, Potato Wedgies - $12, Hamburger Herpies - $12, The Chicago Chubs - $200, Snort- $67.83, Green Gelatin - 80 bucks, Deep Wiff - $99.99, Illegal Stream & Those Damn Pop-ups - 20 bucks, Hard Boiled Legs - 20 bucks, Chicken Flavor - $.20, Free-Beez - $2, The Tripod - $2, Tick Bite - $5, Doug Mosh - $30, Built To Spew - $23, Piss Floors - $20, Unibrow - $5, Peein Waters - one red cent, Broke P.A. - 50 bucks, Old Beef Hung - 12 bucks, Pubics Cube - $65, Smelly Pud - ten bones, Fondled Chump - 3 dollars, The Boss - $6.00, A Good Read - $4.99, The Beedles - 12 dollars, $5 Spicy Italian Footlong - $5, Big Nugget - $3 Leper's Tip - $20.00 Send us a message if you are interested in any of these. Or better yet, set us up a PayPal account and pay us! (LC)

I'm a jerk #2

Maniac Lok called the store the other night asking about his new album which he has consignment. I couldn't hear very well, but he went by his real name (which I will not disclose here), but I had to ask him his artist name 3 times and I still couldn't make it out. So, being the jerk that I am, and too embarrassed to ask him to say it again, I pretended to look. I then asked him how many he left at the store. He said 2, so I told him we still have those 2. He asked, "Are you sure?" I said, "Uh, yep." He said, "Thank you for your time," then hung up. Knowing who this guy is by his real name, I realized I messed up. The dude is legit. So I pulled out the consignment book and looked through all the different forms for everyone who has a consignment with us. (There are a lot, because everyone thinks their band will make it big time if they have their CD in our store. If you ask me, it's a waste of time because nobody buys consignments at our store.) So, I find his form and see the name is "Maniac Lok". I run out there and see that we only have ONE copy of his new album. I straight up lied to him, after a friend of his probably came into the store and bought a copy, then called him up and told him. I felt terrible and tried to call him back twice, but his message service is too full of messages for me to leave one for him. So Maniac Lok, if you ever read this, I'm sorry I lied to you. Sometimes I have a hard time hearing things over the phone, but that is no excuse. I should have sucked it up and asked you one more time...I am sorry. This guy used to play for the Trailblazers. That was how I knew who he was by his real name. He has a barbershop in NE Portland, in case you ever need a trim. (LC)

NICE SHIRT!

(LC)

customers

Him: "You got I'm Not A Human Being by lil' Weezy? Me: "Do you mean lil' Wayne?" Him: "That's what I said." I just found out that lil' Wayne is also known as Weezy to many people.

Boise or Denver? (LC)

biker movie #3

#3: Angels From Hell (1968)- This one felt a little safe after the last two I watched. I mean, it wasn't bad, but bikers don't wear striped shirts, beatniks do. Yeah, watch it if you want. You won't miss much if you don't, though.

(LC)

Newscasters

Do you think Tom Brokaw reads comic books? I mean, even being "retired" he's still doin' the news. Does it ever get old for him? Just wonderin'...and since we're on this topic, I think I'd be a little more trusting of what I'm being told if newscasters had large birthmarks on their faces or at least a giant mole. Too much plastic surgery these days. It makes me question the "truths" I'm being told by phony-looking newscasters. Hey, I strongly believe with the conviction of the bottom of my heart on my unborn children that you don't have to be good-looking to tell the truth. This blog is a testament to that. Your thoughts? (LC)

Biker movie #2

#2: Stone (1974)- Dave Mustaine got together with Turbonegro and they all decided to ride motorbikes together, except they're Australian. See it. (LC)

Costume Parties

I've seen a lot of Halloween photos in the past week. Concerning the large group photos: There always seems to be a dude that has tried to dressed up like a sexy female. Think about it for next time. Do you really want to be that dude? (LC)

Politics

Subaru drivers are the Liberals' equivalent of a Republican. (LC)

Biker movie #1

#1: Hell's Angels '69 (1969)- This movie has a bunch of REAL Hell's Angels in it. It's badass. You should probably watch it. (LC)

Scary movie #18

#18: Werewolves On Wheels (1971)- Oh man. You gotta see this one. Bikers and satanic monks. Well worth your time. Well, this concludes my scary movie marathon for October. I barely made it over halfway past my goal. It's not like I have all the time in the world to hang out and watch movies... Oh well. I guess there's next year...I think maybe I'll watch a bunch of biker movies in November. (LC)

movie 17

#17: The Wolf Man (1941)- It needs more wolfman. (LC)

Gross post (sometimes you have to go there)

I'm sorry, but I have to get this off my shoulders. I think one of the grossest things is when you wipe and get a little on your finger. It freaks me out and I probably use more TP than I should to try to avoid it. Also, everybody looks when they wipe. There. I apologize for dropping to that level. This truth shall not be said again. (LC)

#16

#16: Dahmer (2002)- A friend told me that one of Dahmer's relatives changed their last name. I'm pretty sure I would do the same. (LC)

14 & 15

#14: C.H.U.D.(1984)- A little slow but pretty good. #15: Piranha (2010)- It was kinda good but kinda bad. (LC)

scary movies 10, 11, 12, 13

#10: Dunwich Horror (1970)- This movie is pretty good. #11: The Sentinel (1977)- Kinda creepy. #12: Dracula (1931)- Classic! #13: Re-Animator (1985)- Gnarly flick. Everyone should see it. (LC)

Scary movie #9

#9: Cannibal Holocaust (1980)- This movie is truly special. I don't think I will watch it again. (LC)

Alley Dude

The other day I went to the bookstore in my fine neighborhood. (I at least like to pretend I read.) I walked past this guy. He was just chillin' it that little alleyway and talking to every person that walked by. I could kinda understand. Who hasn't been there before? He might have been drunk, or maybe hadn't slept in a while. I wasn't sure. He was still there when I headed back, so I decided to take his picture (featured above). He seemed like an interesting fella. Probably likes hockey and crap. So I took his photo, then he walked up to me and said, "Hey. I don't want you taking my picture." I told him I didn't, and he said "Oh," and walked back. So, I walked home. 30 minutes later, Wymans sent me out to get her a burrito from Cha. As I drove past this little alleyway, the guy was sleeping in it with his coat over him. I'm glad he finally got some rest. (LC)

scary movies 7 & 8

#7: The Wicker Man (1973)- Great flick. Everyone should see it. Man, I don't like the fuzz telling me what to do, either. #8: Nuda per Satana (1974)- I had a hard time following this movie because it was in Italian. Well, I could follow at least a few things, anyway. You figure it out. (LC)

Scary movies 4,5 & 6

#4:2012:Zombie Apocalyse (2011)- The cartoon zombie tigers at the end killed it for me. #5:Level 7(I think this is the name of it. I can't remember.) - It was a fun movie, but it only if you can read or understand Spanish. I recommend it. #6: Slither (2006)-THIS WAS A FANTASTIC CREATURE FEATURE STYLE FLICK! A MUST SEE. YOUR SKIN WILL BE CRAWLING! It mixes the horror and the comedy very well. I usually hate that crap. (LC)

I never thought I'd admit it but...

I dig The Steve Miller Band. Well, at least their one album called "Greatest Hits 1974-78". Every song is like, a hit. So many good ones that I've heard before on the radio. Or on car commericals. I think this one is my favorite: "Threshold" is pretty cool, too. "Jet Airliner" is a bit of a letdown compared to it, though. Too much boogie-woogie. This album has one major flaw: No "Abracadabra". You know, I'm gonna reach out and grab ya...(LC)

APPS

Did anyone download my new APP? Hopefully not, because I didnt make one. (Bug)

Celebrity Sighting

The rap star Cool Nuts came into the store today to drop off some flyers. He was too busy talking on the phone to say "hi". (LC)

Also...

I'm suspicious of people who wear their own headphones while shopping in a music store. Is our music not good enough or something?...Another thing: Yellow is a terrible color for sports cars and pickup trucks...Also, "dude" is okay. "Duder" is not...that's it for now. (LC)

It might just be me but...

I can't help but be suspicious of parents that name their kid "Mason". Is that wrong? (LC)

Scary movies #2 & #3

#2- Rammock (2010). It wasn't too bad. Not very scary, though. The ending was dumb, and you have to know how to read to understand what people are saying. Watch it if you want to. #3- Pontypool (2008). This movie was kind of spooky. You have to use a lot of imagination on this one. (LC)

Oceanic Risks

I dont like swimming in the ocean. There is just too many variables. I can roll up my pant legs just like any other guy and wade in, but I dont like the idea of goofy Star Wars like critters and sharp rocks becoming or having a hand in my demise. Theres just too many rollar coasters I want to ride still. (Bug)

Browsing

Whenever I have the option of using web version or mobile, I choose web version. (Bug)

Archaic Technology

My VCR recently took a dump and I've been kinda lost without it. I buy a lot of VHS tapes at thrift stores because you can get them for a quarter. I just recently bought a bunch of new ones and was rexcited to spend some quiet time on the couch. I guess I gotta go find a VCR which is gonna be a lot tougher. (Bug)

a simple question

You know those diners that have signs that say, "Serve breakfast all day"? Does that work for lunch, too? Could I go into one at say, 7AM, and order a burger and tots basket, a cobb salad, or a surf n' turf? You know, if I got the hankerin'...I was just wondering...(LC)

Fly on the wall

You may have already seen this photo somewhere else. I just felt compelled to post it here.

I bet that was some party! (LC)

4th annual October scary movie festival

This is the 4th year in a row where I will attempt to watch 31 scary movies during the month of October. I know there are more challenging and prestigious "official" challenges out there doing something like this, but my personal one is about all I have the attention span for. I'll try to keep reviews posted up here. Here is my first review: I got a late start and kicked off the October scary movie festival today with a movie called Strigoi (2009). It wasn't scary. I started reading a book 30 minutes in. This movie is very dull. Lame way to start the fest. I do not recommend watching it, unless you really want to. (LC)

Good times gone

I used to have a pair of really rad aviator glasses. I only bring this up because they are coming back in style with the metalheads again. I'm just saying that I used to have a sweet pair back in the oughts, when only I thought they were cool. You know, the ones with the big mirrored teardrop lenses. I have a large head and these were big enough. I felt like a badass when I wore them. Probably like how Rob Halford feels when he wears his...I lost them dunking babes in the Boise River. That was a lot of fun, but I wish I woulda remembered to take off the shades first. They were bitchin'...

(LC)

3 items of business

1: You wouldn't believe how many people don't know how to operate a Cd player. 2: I saw a dude begging for change at Whole Foods yesterday. He had on Ray Ban prescription glasses. I wish I could afford Ray Bans. 3: You can't polish a turd. (LC)

3 regrets

People say to live life with no regrets. I think that's a stupid philosophy because it is impossible. I believe everyone regrets something because everyone does stupid things. They realize it later. Those who say they don't regret anything are probably too stupid to realize that. Anyway, here are 3 of my many regrets: 1: I wish I embraced Ozzy Osborne into my life sooner. I was too afraid he would make me evil and want to kill puppies for him. When I finally accepted him, I discovered that Slayer are way worse. I embraced Slayer a couple of years before Ozzy. 2: I regret never playing a Dungeons & Dragons game as a kid. I always wanted to but could never find other kids that wanted to play. I still haven't played the game, but I don't think it would be as cool to me now as it would have when I was 14. 3: I wish I could re-do the 1st part of college...and the 2nd part, too...well, all of it. I should have studied Accounting, Engineering, Spanish, Botany, or something like these. Then maybe I could get a job that pays better. So far, my Communication degree hasn't paid squat. No one cares about record stores anymore. (LC)

Preferred Footware

Whew. It's been a hectic few weeks. Wymans had surgery last week. She's just as mean as she ever was, so she's fine. She was only in the hospital for a couple of nights. That's okay with me. I hate hospitals. Someone's gotta take care of her, so I haven't been to work since. That's pretty cool. I gotta go back next week, though:( I just cleaned the house because the in-laws are coming over for the weekend. I worked about 5 hours on it and the place still looks like dog barf. I think I'm going to have a scarf made from all the pug hair I cleaned up. Let me tell you something. I've spent hours pondering this. There are only 4 occasions I can think of that it is appropriate to wear flip-flops: the beach, the pool, the locker room shower, and checking the mail. Any other time you're just slowing the rest of the world down, slacker. (LC)

E.T.

I watched E.T. today for the first time in probably 20 years. It still chokes me up. It doesn't help that the damn alien looks like my dog Ruby.

(LC)

Saturdays

Sometimes its seriously hard to get out of bed on Saturday. (Bug)

Celebrity Sighting!

I'm a jerk. Aesop Dekker came into the store today. You know how there are dudes out there that you think are really cool, and you wished you were friends with them? Well, Aesop Dekker is one of those kinds of dudes that I wish I was friends with. In case you don't know who Aesop Dekker is, he plays/played drums in some really great bands: Ludicra, Hickey, and currently Agalloch (which I have gushed over before on this blog.) He also has a really cool blog that he post hard-to-find/out-of-print music on and usually has great write-ups on them. I you haven't checked it out before, it's called Cosmic Hearse. He hasn't posted anything since June so maybe he's done with it. (Dammit, I shoulda asked.) Anyway, he and a cute hesher chick came in and met a friend. They shopped for records for a bit then came up to the register. I rang his friends up, first. I then asked him if he was who I thought he was. (gotta make sure about these things.) He said yes. So I said "You get a discount." He picked up an Earth record and I can't remember exactly what else. So I hooked him up, then turned to his friends and said, "I woulda hooked you guys up, too, if you had a cool blog like his!" They kinda laughed, but man. That really was kind of a crappy thing to say. I'm a jerk. So, Aesop Dekker, if you ever happen to stumble across this digital rag that Bug and I make, I apologize for being mean to your friends. Thank you for shopping in my store. I hope you will continue with "The Hearse" sometime soon, because I'm getting tired of seeing Vanderbeek's face everyday when I visit. Sorry for the long post. (LC)

Threes

You know how they say things come in threes? I think they are on to something because whenever I go to Wendy's. I always get three Jr Cheeseburgers. (Bug)

3 thoughts

Completely separate from each other: 1. Young people tell every story because every story matters. Old people only tell the stories that matter. 2. Nostalgia is when you play an old song and like it after you recognize the old song really sucks. 3. I really like strawberry milkshakes. the fruit chunks get stuck in the straw, though, which makes me have to suck harder. I don't like that. I usually order a chocolate or vanilla shake. (LC)

A hunch.

My sister K.P. sells Scentsy. I bet her house smells pretty good. (LC)

An analogy.

The Tiger Shark is the Scotty Pippen of the sea to The Great White Shark's Michael Jordan. Comprende? (LC)

An insight.

Having tattoos used to mean you were tough. Now, having tattoos means you have money for tattoos. (LC)

T.V. show review

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

The Internet

I can't lie when I say I have really been missing not having the internet at my house the last few months. Anybody wanna buy a Jeep? (Bug)

Phone guy

Let me get one thing straight. This man is legitimately insane. Most likely Schizophrenia. (What do I know? Well, I'm married to a psychologist. That practically makes me one.) Anyway, this guy spends his day talking on each pay phone in my neighborhood. I'm pretty sure he isn't talking to anyone real because he talks, hangs up, then picks up and talks some more. From what I've caught from the few conversations I've eavesdropped on, he talks about drugs: "LSD, Marijuana, Angel Dust, Vicodin, Cocaine. LSD, Marijuana, Angel Dust, Vicodin, Cocaine. LSD, Marijuana, Angel Dust, Vicodin, Cocaine." Repeat and repeat. When he isn't talking on a payphone, he is usually found walking en route to one...yelling obscenities. Usually one word. okay. I'm going to use some adult language. He only yells "FUCK", and he always sounds really pissed off. Like someone's been messing with him. You know, like someone always sneaking up and giving him a wedgie or something. He walks across the street from our place every day. (K-WY says she saw his wang once as he relieved himself on a telephone pole. Very unsettling, she says.) Anyway, here's the really funny part. While I was at work tonight, K-WY said the phone guy was swearing right on the other side of our fence. Our 3 pugs all ran out into the backyard and went apeshit at him, and he started swearing back at them. I don't know. it just seems like it would be a great moment to catch. Phone guy swearing at the pugs and the pugs barking back at him. With a tall wooden fence separating them. I would probably smile for about 3 minutes if I could witness that for 30 seconds. (LC)

Coincidence or Conspiracy?

One would think the section that gets the messiest at the music store I work at would be music for delinquents. You know, like Heavy Metal, Punk, or Rap. Nope. The Christian/Gospel section gets the messiest...every single day. Go figure. (LC)

Album Review - Motley Crue Dr. Feelgood

I got to start off by saying, what a freaking album. No wonder it sold 18 gajillion copies. So it starts off with a skit, "Terror In Tinseltown" Holy moly, this is already dark. Cars crashing, burning buildings, police. Its a great skit that slams right into the title track. Heavy guitars, dark lyrics about drug abuse and the bad sides of town. "Slice Of Your Pie" comes next and though not a favorite, a pretty juicy track with a Beatles nod to "Shes So Heavy". Rattlesnake Shake is pretty cheesey with its honky tonk horns and piano outro. "Kickstart My Heart" is up next and gets your blood pumping again. Side one closes with "Without You" a pretty good power ballad. Side Two starts with some sweet power pop riffing on "Same Ol Situation", no thats a good song about lame girlfriends, Green Day eat your heart out! "Sticky Sweet" is another chick oriented tune, but a little shall we say more Sticky? HarHar! "She Goes Down" starts off with a zipper opening soundbite. Oh Motley Crue... My favorite track is "Don't Go Away Mad" an awesome power pop jam with great chords and lyrics again about girls. The album ends with another ballad, "Time For Change" is pretty good for a power ballad and uses the oldest trick in the book, the one step key change towards the end to accent the intensity. The album artwork is rad too. (Bug)

My Rock Star Crush.

I love you Kim! xoxo

Elvis Lives!

This guy goes by Elvis. I'm not sure what his real name is, but he's an Elvis impersonator who performs on the street downtown, and that's what everyone calls him. Elvis is kind of a local celeb here in PDX. There's a photo of him hanging up in Voodoo Donuts, he often sings karaoke, and he gets asked to M.C. events occasionally. He took time out of his busy schedule for this photo shoot. Elvis comes in the store now and again looking for karaoke CDs and kids' records from the budget bin. He has a special fondness for H.R. Puffinstuff. When he speaks, he sounds kind of like Scatman Crothers. You know, kind of like a cartoon. Elvis has the worst breath I've ever smelled, his glasses are thick, and if you work where I do he will try to guilt you into cutting him a deal on $.50 records. Elvis is really a very nice guy and part of the character-rich Portland experience. I bet he would let you buy him a sandwich in exchange for a friendly conversation. (LC)

Guest Opinion

"You ever heard the band Candlebox? They suck!" -(Bugs Mom)

The Olympics...

...are an exercise in masochism.  I get sucked into watching the games as much as possible while they're on.  You know, all the life stories that make you choke up and all that crap.  All the drama.  The successes.  The failures.  What people look like from other countries.  Thoughts on body image.  Feeling the need to get in shape.  Eat donuts, brownies, and french fries instead.  The desire to watch every Michael Phelps race to see if he loses. Trying not to look at spoilers for results to events that already happened just so it's exciting when you do watch.  Wondering if Ryan Lochte really is that much of a douche. Really getting into Women's Gymnastics but feeling kind of weirded out by it. Getting into Women's Water Polo and enjoying all the underwater shots of chubby girls treading water.  Cheering for Misty and Kerri to win a 3rd gold.  The neglect on all other responsibilities while the games are on. Forgetting that Syria is killing itself. No Netflix for 2 weeks.  The only break is to catch up on Big Brother.  God Save the Queen.  Diggin' on Jessica Ennis.  Wondering what a 17-year-old does with her/his life after winning a gold medal. Lots of personal reflection on your own life.  Fearing that you peaked at 17, too.  Can't help but feel inferior for your own lack of accomplishments at whatever stage of life you're in. The urge to buy Nike products.  And a subway sandwich.  Loving the underdog and the unassuming. A man with no feet can run really, really fast.  So can a short woman from Jamaica. Watch more and more...It's a full on drug habit.  Then after 2 weeks of assimilation into the t.v. waves...it's over.  You got no choice but to quick cold turkey. And wait another 4 years.  So stupid.  Boycott the Olympics.  Boycott world peace. 'Cause it's never gonna happen...

I'll have to ask K-WY if there's a name for this condition, because I'm feeling it, and it's only halfway over. Damn.  I'm thinking about getting one of those olympic rings tattoos that all the athlete have now.  Sorry for the long post.

Self improvement

In case you're plateauing or hitting the wall:

You can get it here!

Confessions

I'm a pretty big fan of Judas Priest, but the only album I can almost sing word for word is "Ram It Down". How about you? On another note, Iron Maiden killed it at the White River Amphitheater last night. For some reason, guitarist Dave Murray looks like an alcoholic woman to me. That's not a knock against him or anything. He's an amazing dude, along with everyone else in the band. (LC)

Moron Movies

In case you have some spare time. (LC)

Camping

I'm going camping tomorrow. I like walking around outside in the forest. I'm not much for biting flies and such. I don't fish or hunt. I just like to check out the World and stuff. (Bug)

GY!BE

What an amazing band.

(Bug)

Orion Fest

Kinda like Metallica.

(Bug)

Downloading

I downloaded British Steel today. I figure Judas Priest has way more then enough money. Hell, they probably don't get any money from these oldie-moldies if I bought it legit anyway. Bitchin album BTW.

 (Bug)

Questionable music

(LC)

Games

Which one is different? (Hint: The one wearing the hat, dummy.)

(LC)

customers

This guy was a little strange.

But aren't we all. (LC)

movie review

I just watch "The Twilight Samurai". DAMN! That movie is good!...if you like to read. (LC)

In the gutter

My condo complex had it's gutters cleaned out a few days ago. I was in the parking lot working on the jeep. Wait. I have to go back. I was in a fender-bender in May. For once it wasn't my fault. A 16-year-old girl cut a little close during rush hour in her dad's SUV. She wasn't looking. Probably on the phone. The cops showed up and she was on the phone when they tried to talk to her. She wasn't wearing very much for a young lady her age, and then I realized that I'm now old enough to be this girl's dad. Weirdness...Anyway, no one was cited. I'm cool with that. I've been in her shoes (kinda). My jeep is getting old and it really didn't do that much damage. Just a cracked signal light and the plastic end of my bumper got ripped off. I didn't bother with insurance, because I could fix it myself for 50 bucks. My insurance would probably go up more than that if I reported it...So anyway, I finally got around to changing out that cracked blinker light when the gutter cleaners showed up. You know, they do that job quick. Probably the cheapest dudes in town judging by the quality of work. Know what I mean? Well, as they were leaving, I overheard one dude say, "There's a lot of dogshit in that backyard." Hmmm. I have 3 dogs. He could have been talking about my yard. I cleaned up feces in my yard a couple days prior, though. There was hardly any in my yard then. Out of the 9 units in my complex, 6 have at least 1 dog. Since I ruled myself out, I couldn't help but wonder which of my 5 neighbors with dogs has a yard full of dogshit. Sorry for the long post. (LC)

Vet bill

It's good to see that gratitude is still free in some places. (LC)

MISUNDERSTANDINGS

I read this wrong at first glance: (LC)

Fortune cookies

Hopefully the job doesn't require great photography skills. (LC)

Badasses.

One of the greatest film directors of all time. (LC)

Money well spent

So much entertainment in this little newspaper! It even has a game on the back! (LC)

WINCO

I see something different every time I go grocery shopping at Winco: Have you seen this before? Do you know what it is? I mean, I know you're supposed to drink it... (LC)

Mileage.

Wymans got to experience a rare occurence. She was kind enough to share it with me through photography. (LC)

Winning.

A penny slot game, 2nd spin. I cashed out. Fifty bucks, man! (LC)

methmouth

This guy has really bad meth-teeth. He was a nice dude, though. He had a hard time understanding why I wouldn't buy what was left of his Korn CD. I don't know if he used it to buff his car or what. I wouldn't stick it in my CD player, let's put it that way. Sorry about the blurry photo. He moved too fast for me to get a good snap. Must be the drugs. (LC)

Something to ponder

Why is toast so much better than a plain slice of bread? (LC)

Random but cool sperm whale video post

You probably don't see that everyday. (LC)

Ladies and Gentlemen...

I present The Captain. (LC)

CONSIGNMENTS

I don't know a whole lot about this guy. He comes in frequently to check in on his consignment. He is kinda strange. Apparently, he made a hip hop album that got a review in a magazine. I can't remember his name, though. I assume his eyesight isn't very good. That's about it. (LC)

My vacation

I saw a lot of SIIICK bands on my vacation. Here are some photos. Sorry about the quality :( Ceremonial Castings: Weapon: Stonehaven: Pile Of Maggot-Infested Viscera: Laengthengurth: Back to work tomorrow. (LC)