Weird Sayings

" I slept like a baby." So you woke up a hundred times and pissed the bed? Sounds awful.
"Happy as a clam." Who the hell knows if clams are happy?

Coffee Shops

Staying on the topic of caffeine, Why do coffee shops always play lame mellow music like Wilco, The Strokes, or Bob Marley. Why don't they ever play stuff like this:

(LC)

Caffeine

A half of a Diet Coke, a 16oz cup of coffee, and the rest of my wife's iced soy latte, an empty stomach, now I'm tired. I probably have diabetes. I'm eating some trail mix. (LC)

Good taste

Our neighbor across the street LOVES classic rock. How do I know? On warm nights he blares his radio really loud and sings along. Now playing: Heart-Barracuda. I've thought about going over and seeing if he wants to hang out, but I think he's a drug dealer. Not that there's anything wrong being a drug dealer, I just don't want his friends stealing my stuff. (LC)

Grooming

My boss at the bar always breaks out the tiniest comb and runs it through his moustache. The thing is, his moustache is only like 1/16th of an inch long. I wanna tell him, "Hey pal, your moustache isn't all messed up." What does he think, its blowing around in the wind? (Bug)

Intake

The last 24 hours has been a flurry of Taco Bell, Beer, Coffee and Red Bull. (Bug)

Killing time

Let me guess. You're going to go smoke some pot. How original. (LC)

R.I.P. Cliff

I felt compelled to get this up before this day is done. Cliff Burton died 25 years ago today. Total bummer. He was an original hesher, and the key component to an incredible band when they were their best. Cheers. (LC)

Common Sense

Some people ask: "What's more important than money?"

That's easy. The stuff you spend it on, duh. (It would be cool to have bags of money hanging around my condo, though.) (LC)

The new Sebastian Bach album

Baz's new album came out today. I put it on at work. It sounded sorta good. About a song and a half into it, the store owner walked in and said, "Turn this shit off! No one's going to buy this shit! It's terrible!". So I did. But I couldn't help but think to myself, "You're never going to sell it with that attitude. C'mon now."



The funny thing is that he did the same thing to my co-worker last week when he put on the new Barbra Streisand. True story. (LC)

Stupid Shirts

This is about the most stupid shirt I've printed in awhile: (Bug)

Meatloaf/Black Sabbath

I still think somewhere along the line the art dept got these two album covers mixed up: (Bug)

You really have to question your neighborhood when you hear someone pushing a shopping cart down the street at 12:15am. I just leave my cans in a bag next to the recycling bin. It helps keep the trash from getting scattered down a little. (LC)

Some days are just like this:

So don't mess with me. Your cred is the crap I just took. (LC)

Paying Bills Online

I tried to pay my bills online today. I went to the library to use the computer, next thing you know, BAM!, I have to create accounts and passwords and junk like that. Man, they dont make this too easy do they? Back to the post office... (Bug)

Breakfast

Yesterday I got a breakfast burrito from Whole Foods. I normally get an egg and bacon muffin sandwich. I was feeling adventurous yesterday and got the burrito instead. It was full of potatoes! It had some eggs in it too, but not very much. It would have been nice to have a little ham or sausage in it. I mean, it wasn't bad, but I could have had 2 muffin sandwiches for the price of 1 burrito. Lesson learned. (LC)

Mondays

It seems like Monday is the first day of the week, which is deceiving. Sometimes I have to slap myself and remember Sunday is the real start of the week. How screwed up is that guys? Monday gets a bum rap. (Bug)

The Buffalo Bills

I really can't say I'm a football fan. I am excited that the Bills are 3-0 so far this season, though. Any team that loses the Superbowl 4 years in a row demonstrates tremendous character, and deserves my respect. I will never forget.

Corona Light

You guys probably know, but Corona has a pretty sweet label for their beer. Great font usage. (Bug)

Craft-Void

Possible album of the year? I wonder if this guy was stuck in traffic when he came up with this song. (LC)

Work

It's not cool when it's slow at work, but it kind of is. Know what I mean? (LC)

Milk

As far back as I can remember, I've never been just one sided on the issue, in fact quite the opposite. I've been known to drink both 1% and 2%. Sometimes you realize life is too short for the long debates that can occur on these types of things. (Bug)

Irresponsible Behavior

I don't condone some of the the things that happen in this video. (Bug)

JAWS

Some people ask what this movie would be like without the music. I ask what this movie would be like without a big fake shark. (LC)

The coolest website on the internet:

http://www.bandoftheweek.net/ (LC)

TV and Movie Bands

Theres a lot of cool fake bands in movies and TV; Crucial Taunt, Wyld Stallyns, Spinal Tap, CB4, but everybody always forgets Cold Slither. (Bug)

My Perfect 1st Date

Ingredients:

1. A solid camera

2. Face make-up

3. A forest

4. Hot babe (optional). (LC)

Actors

I'm not a big fan of Tom Hanks these days, but he was pretty good in Dragnet. (LC)

The Eagles.

Thumbs down. Always. (LC)

Huxtable's Macaroni and Cheese

It took longer than the suggested 28-31 minutes on the box to heat this Huxtable's Cheese Lovers 5 Cheese Macaroni & Cheese. BE FORWARNED! (Bug)

My phone

Tried this thing with my phone. Didnt work so good. (Bug)

Walgreens Meridian

I bought the last two 5 packs of Maxell CD-R's there today, so they're all out now. Don't go there looking for those. (Bug)